Pillow Talk: だいじょうぶ


That monday, when I choose to went back to jkt, my grandma was at Pontianak. The next two days, my both parents were at work. So there’s only mbak Siti and I in this house. Then I realize a few things:
– This house is too big for one person to live.
– My (alm) grandpa must be kinda lonely without grandchildren running around the house. (My cousins are teenagers now -,-)
– We should let go of the things that time has taken away. Anything. Ahem, when I meant by ‘anything’, it refers to: age, people, priorities, responsibilities, etc. Well, yeah, anything. Sounds cheesy and easy huh? Actually I have the ability to remember conversations and interactions very well, so it’s somewhat hard to let them go –the nice also the bad ones. They stick in my mind like chewy gums.
– After I publicize my previews post, I knew that I have lots of people who are willing to support me :’) thank you very much. But then I thought, “maaaan.. the proposal, the paper, those are all my duty. who the heck would finish it? If I keep being like this, nothing goes anywhere.” So I went talk to my aunt, the wise one.

These what I got:
1. Your TA has nothing to do with your future job.
2. But if one day you have the opportunity to work 8 to 5 in a so-called-kantoran, just consider it as an experience. You WON’T stuck in there forever for the rest of your life. So don’t worry about that.
3. You are a girl, one day you’ll need to adjust your life-plans with your future husband’s. Anything could happen, anything! See? you now understand what I mean by “you won’t stuck on the same job forever”? So, for now, don’t worry about getting yourself graduate first :)
4. It’s okay.

that… last… sentence…. calmed me very much. a lot.
“it’s okay”
so apparently that is just what I wanted to hear. so simple. why am I being so complex when the answer is very simple?


special thanks to HM, LL, ka RK, aunty, for the DM, the messages, all of the questions and support.
super special thanks to Abdel who made me a bowl of cereal x) –my 7 year old cousin.